The good and the bad.....

I will start with the bad because that is what this is journey seems to be all about!

I am sad to say that things did not go well on Friday. It was a very long and emotional day- as this whole trip has been. We took the overnight train to Slovansk and meet the first inspector and then on to the Orphanage to meet the older child. She was PERFECT for our famliy in every way. Long dark hair, striking eyes and a smile that melted our hearts. She was shy, but playful. She enjoyed the sweets and stuffed dog that we brought for her. Hugging and kissing it and making it bark. We spent 5 hours being thrown about by the Director, whom obviously did not want to part with girl, but in the end she warmed to us. We said goodbye to the sweet girl and made our journey to the next inspector and orphanage. There were were presented with the cute 4 years old. She ran right to us, smiling and laughing, even though they had woken her from her nap. (Now the yucky part) However, she has several serious medical issues that Ed and I both believe would have been too much for us to handle. We had intended on adopting both girls, IF they had no serious medical concerns. We have heard that it might be possible to seperate siblings- IF they think that is in the best interest of BOTH children. We told them that we would be interested in adopting the older- with out a doubt. The problem is you have to convince them that it was in the childrens best interest to be seperated. This is almost impossible and it was impossible. They would not seperate them- for several reasons that I will not go into. Needless to say, Ed and I were crushed. We truly believe that it was in the best interest of both girls to be seperated because both needed a lot of one-on-one attention in order to reach their potential. The six yo was more like a 4 yo and the 4yr old like a 2 yo (with lots of medical needs). We knew that we could give the older a wonderful home, but to adopt both would really put a lot of pressure on our entire family. It would not be the best chioce for any of us. It is sad because we really could see this girl in our family. We bonded with her, and she enjoyed us as well. I could tell by the way she ran to Ed with the dog we gave her, smiling and speaking fast in Ukrainian. It was very cute. But no matter what we thought, they would not let us adopt her. SOOOOOOO....we are at a loss. We have not had much support from the people that we are PAYING a lot of money to to help us through this journey. We were hoping that they would have this great plan as to what to do, but all we have heard is "October 13 we can have a second appointment and MAYBE they will have a girl for us." Maybe. MAYBE!?!??!?!?! They told us that there are NO girls in the system that are adoptable right now, and they close for a week, so our hands are tied. We feel strongly that we should count our losses (which in reality are very few having seen what we have since arriving here). But that does not make us feel much better. I can not imagine being here until the end of Novemeber, alone because Ed would have to leave on the 24th of October. We have not made any decision yet, but I would suspect that we are coming home.

We are ok with this. I am ok with this. We have had the CRAZIEST week of our lives traveling half way across the world. Since we got on the plane in Atlanta last week it has been a battle. Not ONE thing has gone right. We missed days of sleep and food -which we all know makes Ed a crazy man! :)- We have seen (and smelled things) that I hope to never see or smell again. We have not showered in two days(gross) and feel like we are constantly in motion- the train is very bumpy and after two night on that I am not sure if the motion sickness will ever go away! We have no help, not the people we pay to help us, or the people we shake hands with- with "full" hands.(read between the lines here.....). While I do believe that some people really do want to help the children, I also think that as many don't care about the kids and only about themselves. We knew the potential of not finding a child, although we prayed it would not happen to us.

And now the good news...... :)

Ed and I have learned a lot about ourselves, eachother and our family. Like I said, we have seem some pretty bad, sad, things this week. It makes you put things at home into perspective. We have two amazing boys, a beautiful home and community, and luxuries that we often take for granted. We see how good we ALL have it to live in such a great country- even though it has it own share of problems. We have more things available to us than we will even need in life. They can't even put the heat on when it is cold, it is Goverment controlled so they have to wait until they decide to put it on...and then it it 100 degress in the house because the don't regulate it! We are blessed every day. Ed and I know that our lives are changed forever having seen what we have seen and done what we have done. We have no regrets, whatever may happen. None. It is a lesson to us and the boys as well. I think that we are all learning that no matter what you do, no matter if you follow all the rules and do what is asked of you, you can't always get what you want BUT life goes on. What you make of it from that point on, is up to you.

We want to thank everyone who has supported us along this journey. Your words mean more to us than you will ever know. Your emails, comments and advice has given us something to look forward to when we start up the computer. Thank you.

I will post as soon as we decide what to do. We are in Kiev and will enjoy sight-seeing and souvenier shopping for the time being.

Love, Kristina

Here are a few things that I wanted to share that have nothing to do with nothing, but we thought they were funny or interesting:

1. While in JFK we saw a women put a diaper on a dog. Seriously. It was a Yorkie. She put the diaper on it and them walked it around on a lease. Changed the diaper, wiped the dogs paws with a baby wipe and then put the dog in it's carry-purse.

2. We learned a new word "Texican". We ate at an Irish Pub in Kiev that used the word "Texican" in it description of a meal. Ed and I have decided that we like that word so much, we will use it often. :0)

3. The women here all wear shorts skirts and VERY high, skinny heal, BOOTS. High to the knee or over the knee boots. Think Julia Roberts, Pretty Women. The sidewalks and roads are not easy to walk on. They are hilly, broken, cracked and sometimes cobblestone like. I have no idea how they do it. I think that this might be a new sport for the next olympic games. The craziest part is that I have seen young girls (as young as 9/10) walking around in the same thing. They start them young here.

Thats all for now- we are going out for Pizza!! Yum!- oh - I am not spell checking so please forgive me.... ;) Ed says "hello" to everyone! :)